troubled mind

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Posts by troubled mind

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  83

  If you felt/feel that you had/have good, close "friends" in the org, how did/does it feel to just give them up?

  by Crisis of Conscience in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  this is my biggest dilema.

  although mentally i really feel i could walk away from the org right now, i still have genuine love for the people i have come to know over the years.

  i love people!.

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  troubled mind

  Terry I like very much what you wrote !!! I hope you don't mind if I quote you on my facebook blog .
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  83

  If you felt/feel that you had/have good, close "friends" in the org, how did/does it feel to just give them up?

  by Crisis of Conscience in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  this is my biggest dilema.

  although mentally i really feel i could walk away from the org right now, i still have genuine love for the people i have come to know over the years.

  i love people!.

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  troubled mind

  I have a hard time dealing with this fact off and on . In fact the past week I have been feeling very blue over the loss of relationships . We have been inactive four yrs now and I thought I was over those feelings .

  Before we began our fade it was already evident that our friendships were conditional . I had begun to miss meetings (the first time in 30 yrs.) because of caring for my sick Mother . My husband had let his field service time slip and the brothers approached him to let him know he no longer qualified to help at quick builds .(something he had done for many years ) Because of our obvious weakness in this matter our superficial friends no longer invited us to do anything ,even at meetings if we didn't initiate the conversation others would simply ignore us . My husbands own step brother (Elder) could not be bothered to say hello to us .

  My neice and sister in law often had problems with others in the congregation and would come to me for sympathy and a listening ear . When I went to them with some of my doubts ......they immediately told an Elder and took the counsel that I was bad association and quit speaking to me .....

  We basically grew up in this hall . Raised our family here . Were an active well thought of family ........NO ONE took the time to just stop by and discuss what was wrong ... We explained this to the Elders that recently visited . How can we find any desire to return to people that really underneath did not have the same love we had for them ? A true friend would have tried to understand , would have asked what is wrong ?

  Even now after telling this Elder of the mamy things that bothered me there was no offer to clarify any of the issues I had .....

  I think their visit just stirred up all those hurt feelings once againin me ....And no matter how much history we share with certain people from the hall ....our relationships can never be the same again, because we now see everything different than they do . My hurt comes from with in because I want so badly for them to understand my feelings , but they never will because they are in fact "my" feelings not theirs .

  My husband doesn't understand why I let it get me down ....he just see's it as it is and moves on ....I wish i could do that to .

  For me their visit re-opened wounds that now have to re -heal themselves again ......Does any one else feel like this sometimes ????
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  24

  My kitty is having kittens soon and Im stressing about it. Advice?

  by WuzLovesDubs in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  like i dont have enough going on right now...my kitty is expecting and im not sure when she actually got pregnant but im thinking her due date might be around 5/10.

  i have read online a bit about the process and i hope she can handle this.

  i made a secure and private kittening box for her and she seems to like it in there with ripped up rags she can pile up into a nest.

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  troubled mind

  I'm sure she will be just fine . Over the yrs we have had cats with litters ,and I don't think we ever had to do anything but sit by and watch . Your first cat was most likely the exception to the rule cats usually handle birthing on their own just fine .

  Good luck and keep us posted when the baby kitties are here
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  40

  I had to hurt my kids this weekend... it sucks

  by Aussie Oz in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i have been in a world of pain this weekend.. some of you know the ongoing battle i have had with my ex wife, an uber dub hypocrite, over seeing my kids more.

  3 weeks ago i managed to secure an agreement from her that provided my 13 yr old daughter friday night to sunday afternoons and for my 16 yr old son to have friday night to sat afternoon with the option to extend it to sunday if he so desires.

  this is each second weekend.. first due weekend visit she rearranged the days so that she was technically pre agreement start date.

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  troubled mind

  You did the RIGHT thing and have nothing to feel bad about . Your children are old enough to understand the real situation . They also deserve to know how important they are to you and that you need time with them ! You were fair and reasonable ,they will grow to appreciate that trait in you . I can tell from your whole story you don't bad mouth their mother to them and that is good . You can give them a glimpse though on how JW"S view matters ,and how NORMAL people do things though .

  Very important for you to counter balance the guilt your son will be experiencing from his mother .......Because he is old enough to chose he will be harped at for choosing to stay longer and missing Sunday meeting . Explain this to him in no uncertain terms so he truely understand the pressure that WILL be facing him . He needs to know it is okay for him to stay and have time with you and it does not mean he is choosing you ober Jehovah .....because believe me that is how it will be put to him .

  BE STRONG and keep holding to the new agreement.... MEAN IT !!! I think maybe your wife has taken advantage of your good nature up to this point and she needs to know things have now changed .
• 
  40

  I had to hurt my kids this weekend... it sucks

  by Aussie Oz in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i have been in a world of pain this weekend.. some of you know the ongoing battle i have had with my ex wife, an uber dub hypocrite, over seeing my kids more.

  3 weeks ago i managed to secure an agreement from her that provided my 13 yr old daughter friday night to sunday afternoons and for my 16 yr old son to have friday night to sat afternoon with the option to extend it to sunday if he so desires.

  this is each second weekend.. first due weekend visit she rearranged the days so that she was technically pre agreement start date.

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  troubled mind

  You did the RIGHT thing and have nothing to feel bad about . Your children are old enough to understand the real situation . They also deserve to know how important they are to you and that you need time with them ! You were fair and reasonable ,they will grow to appreciate that trait in you . I can tell from your whole story you don't bad mouth their mother to them and that is good . You can give them a glimpse though on how JW"S view matters ,and how NORMAL people do things though .

  Very important for you to counter balance the guilt your son will be experiencing from his mother .......Because he is old enough to chose he will be harped at for choosing to stay longer and missing Sunday meeting . Explain this to him in no uncertain terms so he truely understand the pressure that WILL be facing him . He needs to know it is okay for him to stay and have time with you and it does not mean he is choosing you ober Jehovah .....because believe me that is how it will be put to him .

  BE STRONG and keep holding to the new agreement.... MEAN IT !!! I think maybe your wife has taken advantage of your good nature up to this point and she needs to know things have now changed .
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  12

  Will a person be "marked" for playing in a rock band?

  by hoser in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  if a brother or sister is musically talented and decides to play at clubs or dance halls for money will they receive counsel from the elders?

  ?.

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  troubled mind

  YES , at least in our hall . Several times over the yrs teens would start a band together and they got nothing but grief from the brothers over it . One poor Elders son had to quit playing music with a group of brothers, and he was so talented ....next thing I know he is playing kingdom songs on his guitar at gatherings . What a waste of talent and youthful fun .
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  39

  Guess which guy in the picture is BackRoomBilly

  by BackRoomBilly in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  i just thought it would be fun to put a face to some of the people who don't mind sharing.

  i understand some of you can't.. .

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  troubled mind

  The naked one in the middle flashing all of us .......not shy are you
• 
  39

  Guess which guy in the picture is BackRoomBilly

  by BackRoomBilly in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  i just thought it would be fun to put a face to some of the people who don't mind sharing.

  i understand some of you can't.. .

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  troubled mind

  must be one of those cushy minimum security places cause the guard tower in the background has no razor wire on top
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  39

  Guess which guy in the picture is BackRoomBilly

  by BackRoomBilly in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  i just thought it would be fun to put a face to some of the people who don't mind sharing.

  i understand some of you can't.. .

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  troubled mind

  since when do in-mates get white plastic picnic chairs to rest in ???
• 
  18

  Longtime Lurkers?

  by Bluegill in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  when i joined this forum i mentioned that i was a lurker for 3 or 4 years before i actually joined.

  it did take me a long time!

  anyway i posted a comment on a hobby forum that i belong to and this was part of someones reply..... "btw, how is it possible to have been on this forum for 6 years, and only have 8 posts?".

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  troubled mind

  sheesh 11 posts and already kissing up ....just kidding